There are a couple of major talks most parents have with their kids at some point in time.
The birds & bees talk, and the “Buster went to live on a farm upstate” talk.
Last night on the bus ride after the show in Newkirk, Sean gave me the talk.
Not the birds & bees talk. I learned all that long ago through a series of playground conversations with my friends and some wrinkled up old Playboy magazines.
(This is probably why I thought for years that I’d never get a girl pregnant as long as I did 100 push-ups before the act)
But back to the talk.
Sean gave me the talk that parents give their kids when it’s time to flush a goldfish, or explain why Fluffy the hamster hasn’t moved in two days, or worse yet, why Mittens isn’t going to come home from this trip to the Vet.
Only Sean was talking about Larry!
Larry! has been taking a beating for several months now, but his fall backstage in Phoenix did some real damage, and when he took another fall in the windstorm in Sacramento last week, things got worse.
So Sean tried to prepare me for the inevitable time when Larry! will have to be put down.
Much like any child would react to the talk, I wasn’t hearing what Sean was trying to say, and it didn’t help that he was making no effort at all to sugarcoat things like a good parent would do.
Then Mike piped in and said that I should just order another mannequin.
Just order another mannequin?
What is wrong with these guys?
Larry! has been in the fold for over six years now.
He’s been to 18 countries and dozens of cities.
He’s worn Daisy Duke’s, tighty whiteys, and a tutu, all for the entertainment and enjoyment of others.
He serves a valuable purpose.
You don’t just throw a treasured family member on the scrap heap and order a new one from Amazon.
You find ways to fix him, patch him up, and keep him going.
Which is what I pledge to do.
As long as I’m around to help facilitate it, Larry! will continue to have a presence in Aliceville.
We’re nowhere near being done with this touring cycle, and neither is he…